Archive for July, 2011

心里突然冒出一种厌倦的情绪,觉得自己很累很累。

At this point in time, I felt like I wasted the whole day over someone so insignificant. But I cannot help. Tears just roll like it was a good rollercoaster ride.

And it makes me miss Wen Hao so much. A very special friend of mine. He is someone who would always be able to agree to disagree with me. We can always argue and yet be alright the next few moments. He is the only person who can make me cry in front of him. And the very terrible one was at a party of my friend! SO AWKWARD. But I felt relieved each and every time he made me cry. I miss those times when he would just drive me around or stop somewhere quiet just so we can share some quiet times amongst ourselves!

I so wish he is right here with me =( And also Michelle. How I hope every girl in this whole world is more or less like her. Not some stupid bimbos on the road. Ok, not to say those who are not like her are bimbos. I am just very biased towards girls who are comfortable just being in their shoes and do what they say. Not be pretentious and act what they think they should be like to impress.

No matter how much they deny, just cause they want to think they are saints, it will always fail because of the feeling exuded. People made it a taboo to gossip and swear against it. Now, seriously think over it, how many people around you achieved that? I only have two friends out of so many that really did this! Even me myself, I talk about people. And in that sense, I am gossiping!

I always feel very defensive when people say I am gossiping. Really. But I cannot deny that! At least I tell of what is real and true rather than some rumours that has been passed by God-knows-how-many-people. And I will try my best to verify too. Such is my KPC-ness.

People been saying how naive and how childish I am. I do not mind so much actually, because I think I am. Just today Wedya told me it feels as if I never grew up ever since she knew me four years ago. A total kid! I am actually happy over that remark. And we talked about the pasts too. Those were the days! I will grow up one day and laugh back at all those silly moments.

But right at this moment, I feel so tired of everything. I just felt like running away. Packing some luggage and just go some where! FLY ME SOMEWHERE PLEASE! =(

Just felt like being an antisocial,

The one who needs a few days of silence.

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Think happy thoughts please

Do you have have certain quotes that you love? I certainly have more than a handful!

One of my favourites is “The only constant in life is change”. Just as how definite I was about not continuing to work with my current company, I am now STILL working. Nothing beats not planning at all eh?

Another one of my favourite quote which is often misattributed to Dr Seuss is:

Those who matter don’t mind, and those who mind don’t matter. – Bernard Baruch.

I know! Those who know me well know I won’t be able to live up to that quote as much as I would love to. I always care too much. Even though I how much I said I do not care, I would fail in the end.

How I hope in life, there is “block” button or selective modes, just like in Facebook. People say we can choose our own happiness. In my opinion, that is just to an extent.

There are people who would come barging in my life without even a polite knock. If only I can hit the “block” button instantly, I would certainly be happier. But life holds no such thing without going to the extreme, like… resigning. It is of course not worth it to resign! =S I am still in my right mind!

I am already missing Jeremy. Things just happened without a notice and his absence. I used to complain to William, and he left. Then Jeremy, and he left. I think it is time to stand on my own.

I know, I am not on my own… *think happy thoughts* Thanks for my many other friends who care and love me ❤

Time to go bake then swim,

The one who cares too much! =(

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Tug of war

How I dislike this feeling of being so frustrated yet so helpless. Helpless in the sense that people are so good in showing their own emotions.

I dislike this feeling that I am very annoyed and frustrated, yet feel so sorry for being so. It just tells me that I have no rights to be annoyed and frustrated. And also the fact that I could not live up to being kinder to everyone I meet.

“Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle” – PLATO

Things kept re-running within me. What if I just pick up the phone call? What if I just stood there to explain things to the media? What if I just do what ever she wants me to? What if I just listened to what ever she requested?

SO MANY WHAT IFS! Just if I give in more, complain lesser, be a lot kinder, she might not be as stressed and would not have an emotional break down. I am not as naive as my friend thinks (but still, thanks for the cheering up). I would really believe she had an emotional breakdown rather than making up a show of crying out in the showroom. As Zach said, she is a really emotional person.

I thought I was at the peak of being happy at work,

The one who is having a tug of war with her heart and brain.

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Fuming

I just cannot help but got all frustrated.

SHE JUST SAID THAT I AM VERY CALCULATIVE! >-[Talk about being calculative NOW. Who is the who always asked me to pick up the call when she is just oh-so-near the phone just cause it was NOT her boss’s phone? Who is the one who always talked to me about me doing some stuff because it is NOT related to event (Marketing)?Just this morning during the launch, she had to just repeat over and over again how we on the product (Marketing) should handle the customers asking about the product. HELLO! ALL IN THE MARKETING WERE ASKED TO GO FOR THE TRAINING. AND YOU DARE SAY YOU KNOW NO NOTHING ABOUT THE PRODUCTS?

Ok, so we went out to do the talking there after. But do you have to reiterate about it, and also IN FRONT OF THE CUSTOMERS AND MEDIA? =SAnd I actually thought she changed and start not being calculative anymore. In terms of picking up calls, of course. But this afternoon proved otherwise. I was in a discussion with Alvin, on his project. Quite a distance away from the phone, in comparison to her. And she had to say: “That is your  boss’s phone ringing. PICK IT UP!” =SAfter that, I was back to discussing with Alvin about the project. And she cut us both by asking Alvin about photography. Alvin was blur for a moment and I cut in saying that we have our own camera and would be doing it ourselves (as per usual). And she replied me very rudely saying: “I am talking with Alvin, not you” =.=Nevermind about that again! Thereafter, Zach came back and she had to go out. Since she LOVES her boss so much, when going away from her work position, she should just report to Zach! Out of my expectation, she told me where she was heading to. And I replied her: “SORRY! Zach is your boss, you can just report to him” I was right what?! I have no rights over what she want to do or not do! =S Zach was there and just smiled! wtf!

And guess what she replied?“YOU ARE SO CALCULATIVE”

wtf?! Look into the mirror! Go face the wall if you need to. And THINK!!! Use your PEA-BRAIN! THINK! WHO IS BEING CALCULATIVE?!

Maybe I should have said, “Yes, thanks. I learnt it from you. Now go away.”

Grrrrr,

The one who just want to be happy.

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Coming to terms

I am starting to come to terms with what happened previously. I do not mind others knowing now. Well, just those whom I am in close contact with =)

Enjoying work life pretty much now but could not fathom how August might be. I have been EXTREMELY tired but could not get a long night sleep =S

Just because I am too tired, I got home to SLEEP. I always thought it was 5am when I woke. BUT it is ALWAYS 10pm =S PLEASE SAVE ME =(

It is going to be a long day again,

The one who does not want to be an insomniac.

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Create more awareness please.

This article brought me to tears. I am no big animal lover. I must admit how much I am terrified by even the littlest kitten. But this article really brought me to tears…

http://hubpages.com/hub/A-Teary-Mother-Bear-Killed-Her-Baby-and-Committed-Suicide-A-Heart-Breaking-True-Story

It is about beastly bears in captive under total cruelty. They lost their beastly nature and turned docile. Docile in the sense that they were kept in cages and in iron vest.

Just reading that article, I felt the pain! BEAR BILE! Why the hell do people need that? If only those who used/buy the bear bile know the process! =(

Stupid people,

The one who feels the pain.

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I did not realise I have so many drafts left unpublished. Hence all these random posts.

xx

CC

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