Of words and the hurt they bring

I really thought I was over the whole fiasco already. I really thought I can close that chapter.

In fact, I thought it was long closed!

Just until last night, mere reminders send me to tears. More discussion made me tear uncontrollably. I thought my tears were worth more than that. But I guess, words said or actions done just cannot be erased so easily.

I do not feel sick or complain as much already I think? eventhough I am sick. I will recover in no time. This is my positive vibe =P It still hurts a lot thinking back how some people were so insensitive to even suggest that I will pretend to be sick to seek attention. They think so lowly of me.

There was this girl who complained of gastric and probably she does have heartburn problems. She never seen a doctor for her so called pain, such that I can even accuse of her that being just some monthly periodic cramps! I see a doctor on continuous appointments for my conditions yet I was accused of such words.

It really does hurt till now. I have forgiven her or them in fact. I thought with forgiving, comes forget. Obviously I did not forget. I have forgiven in the sense that I am not angry anymore. But when it comes to talking to them, maybe some slight awkwardness. But I am readily able to mingle with them as long as they are up to it (sincerely). That is how I know I have forgiven.

I will not try to forget but to let the thing pass itself. It really frightens me to think that in future, some other people might say the same or do the same as they did to me. I am afraid. Very much afraid.

I hope I can face that truthfully so in future, I stand strong and can just ignore those hurts hurled at me. I will be fine.

I must be fine,

The one who will walk out of hurt and not let others wrongdoings harm her.


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